It had been nearly two years since I was last in Seattle, a city I love and feel so connected to. My recent trip there was an attempt to heal another layer of my heart and to enter into the space as an individual again. I planned on going back to places I’d been before, as well as engage in new experiences and I feel like I had a good balance of the two. I found myself crying on the bus (more than once), eating amazing food, taking photo booth pictures in bars, and getting new ink. I sat by the water for hours each day and felt its healing nature.

My first half day there I took the light rail into the city from the airport and checked into my hotel in Capitol Hill. I took the bus to a thrift store and found cute jam jars I now use for glassware. I asked the person ringing me up for a crystal shop recommendation and they pointed me in the right direction. I got a green onyx sphere and a banded agate. The person ringing me up asked if I am a therapist when I gave them my items and I was touched by their intuitiveness. Next I found myself at La Dive, a great wine bar with a sick bathroom for taking selfies. About two doors down is a fabric and yarn shop called Stitches. I came away with felt to make a little koala for my nephew and yarn to make a new beanie.

After dropping off my items at the hotel it was onto another bus headed for L’Oursin, a French restaurant, for dinner. As I sat on the patio and enjoyed each course, reading my book, The Femme Mystique, I felt genuinely at ease. I found gratitude in that evening, dining alone, engaged in sapphic literature.

Somewhat last minute I ended up meeting someone for a date at a bar close to my hotel that evening. And while that date really didn’t go anywhere exciting, I’m glad I was able to meet up with her and add that experience to my trip. In fact, the spot she had me meet up with her at the next night ended up being a bar I’d been to before. Something I have always romanticized is the photo booth strip of pictures with a lover. It makes my heart soar to do it with the person I’m dating. I also step into the photo booth when I’m single, and this particular photo booth was one I could remake memories in, just myself, on a trip and journey that was healing for my heart.

Day two started with breakfast at Oddfellows and a meander through Elliott Bay Book Co. I picked up a t-shirt, card to later mail myself, and a book on pacific northwest birds. From there I caught the bus up town to Eastlake. As the bus got closer to my exit, I could feel my emotions welling up. This is a neighborhood that truly felt like home. It was home, in large part, because of the person I spent time there with. But what I discovered on this trip is that it still felt like home to me. It feels very similar to my neighborhood in Sacramento. It’s close to the water, which comforts me. It’s calm and quiet. It felt like my own, and that was incredibly reassuring.

I grabbed a sandwich from the bodega and headed off to Fremont Brewing and the vintage mall close by. Dinner that night was happy hour at Tamari Bar and it was incredible. From there I bopped around the hill for a bit, wandering through shops, meeting up at the bar mentioned above with the photo booth, a Drag Race watch party at a gay bar, and an attempt to spend time at a lesbian bar that lasted about five minutes. But hey, I’m proud of myself for trying!

I spent the first half of day 3 (and day 4) back in Eastlake, enjoying coffee, the water, and the neighborhood. I wrote myself a letter and dropped it in a mailbox before heading out. Later in day 3 I had an appointment in Ballard for a tattoo with Sierra Margaret and am in love with the piece they gave me. From there I walked to a nearby wine bar called Halfseas. The wines were delicious, as was the appetizer. I sat and journaled in my travel notebook, documenting in pictures, menus, receipts, a tidbits from the trip. Riding home on the bus that night was another moment I found myself engaged with deep emotions and heavy tears. It felt right though - cathartic.

For my last morning I knew I needed to get back to Lake Union one more time. Before heading down to the water, I walked to a free little library I’d seen a few days before to drop off a copy of the monthly zine I create and drop off in free little libraries around my house. June’s theme is “Healing Days,” so it only was right to leave one in Eastlake. I’m constantly healing - from heartbreak, from religious trauma, from anxiety, from life. Some days are hard. Some days are joyful. Some are full of anger and rage. Others are full of softness and tenderness. I suppose it’s all part of the journey.